Innocuous time waster

Silly game that's surprisingly addictive. I got stuck on the last level for about 20 tries.

Note, that particular link is ws, but there are things you can get to from there that you shouldn't let your boss see.

Blah

I think I finished the internet.

I'm not blogging for a little while. My primary blogging principle has always been to have fun doing it. If it feels like work or an obligation, stop. So I'm taking a little break.

Surely that won't last for long. I just wanted y'all to know I was still lurking around. Boo!

Cool pool

The Chinese Olympics swimming pool is pretty awesome. Surprisingly, or maybe not, the transparent "watercube" is energy efficient as it soaks up solar energy all day.

I'll post something substantial when I get around to it.

Swingset

I'll blog about the weekend later. For now, enjoy this awesome video of a sheep attacking a swingset.

Weekend report: Saturday afternoon edition

I got up around 10 and blew a .02. One of my friends is still bleeding and puking, elsewhere thankfully. We're about to crack the champagne, because c'mon, we only have 7 hours of drinking time until the game starts.

Further bulletins as events warrant.

It's my blog

... and I'll post weird stuff if I want to.

In honor of today, I am posting on my favorite pet subject. Yes, it's another UFO video that no one will watch. But I mean this when I say I only link the good ones.

The most convincing shots are about an hour and 17 minutes in (about the Italian tether satellite that mysteriously broke). Um yeah... you read that right. It's a skosh on the long side.

But all the video is stolen from NASA (some guy obsessively recorded NASA's raw feeds for years) and there are no wacky grey alien anal probe stories. It's fairly convincing that there's some weird things flying around in low orbit, assuming you take astronauts as trustworthy sources.



My plans for the weekend are a nice dinner Friday with family, and a night out with a new friend. I'll try not to end up in disreputable situations again, but no promises.

Saturday I'm seeing the Sonics play courtside. My buddy's boss gave him tickets. I don't care about basketball, and lord knows no one gives a crap about the Oklahoma City Sonics, but they're free tickets. And since it's VIP seating, free beer.

I feel bad for the true fans who'll be sitting in the upper level, but not that bad. For all the times I've gone to see my favorite bands and watched the losers in the front row just sit there while the rest of us go buck-frickin'-wild, I think a little turn about is fair play.



I might as well toss out some other videos I've found in the last few days. Here's a weird one about a girl who was raised by dogs. No really. And here might be the most sincere firsthand reporting on Iraq I've ever seen. C-Span is my new favorite news source.

Hey Mom

I found someone special I'd like you to meet. I just know you're going to love her/him!

UPDATE: Wow, this picture beats the others by a longshot.

I miss football

Every weekend is a little empty until late August. Until then, you could amuse yourself with these nifty graphs of third down results. It goes to a Michigan blog, but every team is included in the graphs.

It's a damn good thing there's hockey around to keep me from killing myself.

Cozy

A dollop of karma

Another collection of random mini-posts.


* Wendy's doesn't dip the buffalo chicken. Everyone needs to know that. I've mentioned the allure of generic buffalo stuff before.

I got myself one of those Wendy's buffalo chicken sandwiches, the ones they gratuitously show dunking in sauce on the commercial. Scam! They don't come close to dunking it in sauce.

A silver dollar. That's it. Merely dollop-sized, it tis. Dollop, I say! Scant traces of buffalo wing. It wouldn't bother me so much if they didn't go out of their way to advertise the "fact" that it's completely dunked in sauce.

Maybe I shouldn't expect so much out of a second rate fastfood joint, but once again, no one anywhere ever gets buffalo stuff right. I don't know what bothers me more: the being cheated once again, or the lack of reliable wing stuff.

Oh what times are these, when you can't even trust the veracity of fastfood advertising??

[UPDATE: Look at this google search. Haha! Go to hell, Wendy's! -- as they quake in their boots. Hey, I'm a blogger, man... that means, like, ya know, I have like, the power? of teh internets? Tubular. Yeah.]


* I was watching Ghost in the Shell, one of the more popular anime shows you can catch on Adult Swim, and realized a Japanese girl I was semi-dating in college passed off the goldfish story as her own. That's ok, because I was sending her Phish lyrics and calling them my own. Karmic retribution?


* Why does everyone but me think you can assemble an army and invade the Caucasuses in under 25 minutes? Yes, I'm sure you're going to walk home, shower, change, buy beer, and be back in 20. But allll the same you might as well head out 15 minutes ahead of time, just to be sure. I know it doesn't bother you to stumble over strangers in the dark to find a seat, but it bothers me. Eh.


* Am I the only person who karmically balances their grocery cart? You know how when you go shopping for beer, but you buy other stuff? Good healthy stuff like vegetables and tofu, to offset the beer?

Naw, me neither.

Incidentally, I have enough salad makings to feed all the sheep in New Zealand. Grazing, anyone? Broccoli. We're talkin' qwest field sized. You could dunk an escalade in the hummus.


* I was Dad for a day today. My bro's wife and kids came to town to see the science museum. She asked if I wanted to help out and of course I said yes.

There's something odd about being "Dad", especially when the kids can walk and talk. I'm not the sort to get overly emotional about stuff like this, but it hits you right there when a little kid calls you Daddy and wants to be picked up. You don't see it coming. It's like being sucker punched with love.

Right there in the same spot that elephant got up from when you found out your Dad wasn't going to die. And you know, you just know, in that instant, that you would do anything for this little person. Suddenly the thought of being a parent is no longer quite so fearsome (you mean there's an upside?).

These are the sorts of poignant moments you have when your nephews are crawling through a giant rectum. What are these positive emotions I'm feeling? I still have emotions? Didn't alcohol deaden all those pathways yet? I guess not.

She wants me to take the boys to the museum alone next time. That would be my first solo. I should be looking for ways to shun the responsibility, but I'm actually really looking forward to it. The boys are 6 and 3.5.

Doesn't she know what a scatter brained idiot I am? And then the truly scary thought sets in: if she trusts me, she must think I wouldn't make a terrible father. Damn. There goes another excuse.


* Signs you're getting older number 782: you look at the ring finger of the girl before checking out her ass.


That's all for now.

This is our home

Yeah, I pretty much can't resist posting things about Carl Sagan, who might be the finest human being to ever put word to paper. This worksafe video could be slightly uncomfortable for religious people, though the overall point is that we ought to be helping ourselves better than we are. Quite touching, IMO.


If you prefer another philosophy, how about wisdom from Calvin's Dad?

Q. Why does the sky turn red as the sun sets?
A. That's all the oxygen in the atmosphere catching fire.
Q. Where does the sun go when it sets?
A. The sun sets in the west. In Arizona actually, near Flagstaff. That's why the rocks there are so red.
Q. Don't the people get burned up?
A. No, the sun goes out as it sets. That's why it's dark at night.
Q. Doesn't the sun crush the whole state as it lands?
A. Ha ha, of course not. Hold a quarter up. See, the sun's just about the same size.
Q. I thought I read that the sun was really big.
A. You can't believe everything you read, I'm afraid.

Ann Coulter is so hot

What? What did I say?

Actually, if we're talking about blondes of dubious moral fiber, I'd prefer this crazy bitch.

There went the hit counter

It's too bad this blog sucks. Sorry, just stupid random shit here.

Links

I've discovered that some of my favorite sites are unknown to many people. It's only fitting that I enlighten you with the sites I enjoy, being your intellectual and moral superior. Er... um, yeah.


Overheard in New York. An old standard. Good for killing time.

Bits and Pieces. Random silly stuff.

Achewood. R rated online comic strip. You won't get some of the humor until you know the characters, but it's still enjoyable to a newcomer. Hover the cursor over the comic to get a bonus joke (if it doesn't fully display in Firefox, right click and read the title; sometimes you have to scroll right to see it all). Here's a good recent story arc. All the characters also have their own blogs, which are great for those who want to amuse themselves and get nothing done at the same time.

PostSecret. People send in their secrets to this guy and he puts some of them on his blog. There are no archives and it's updated every Sunday (if you want the archives, buy his book). Fun for every voyeur.

Neatorama. Random neat stuff.

English Russia. Stuff happens in Russia. This guy blogs about it in a language not replete with backwards P's and suchnot.

Blowing Smoke. Jim Treacher is hilarious. I don't give a crap at all about gossipy hollywood stuff unless he or his co-author write about it.


That's just a few ways I waste my time.


And this is just a site I found recently. Can you name all 50 states in ten minutes? I got it with a minute and a half to spare. I pounded right through the first 49, and then sat there for about 7 minutes scratching my head.


And just so you don't take my opening sarcasm too seriously: I'm not going to say I did go to a strip club this weekend. I'm not going to say I didn't. But I am suddenly much poorer.

Once again I'm reminded of what a stupid waste of money they are. And you have to put the humanity of the strippers out of your mind or you'll be sick with how their lives have turned out. Sad. Very sad. (they all seemed to enjoy their job, but I can't imagine that carries over to real life)

If your daughter is on the pole, you done fucked up as a parent. What kills me are the wedding rings. Maybe they're fake, but they can't all be. Who marries a stripper? Makes you wonder.

And the shame. Oh, the shame. It takes a few showers to feel clean again.

I mean, that's how I would feel, if I had actually gone to a strip club.

The Nietzsche Family Circus

Funny. Random Nietzsche quotes paired with random Family Circus cartoons.