I hate United Airlines

I stayed up all flippin' night just to check in at 6:45am online, and it says I have to "see a representative". This information could have been imparted to me, oh I dunno, YESTERDAY.

Apologies in advance for the language you're about to read.

FUCK YOU UNITED AIRLINES. FUCK YOU STRAIGHT TO HELL. YOU GO TO HELL AND YOU DIE.

Seriously, there is no consarned point in having an online check in if it doesn't work. And why am I so animated about this? United emailed me to remind me to check in online, touting all the non-existent benefits. Effing jerkholes, that's who they are. Now I'm gonna get a middle seat in the back between two fat guys. Blech.

Ok, so in all fairness, I didn't stay up just to check in. She left around 4:30. But I would have gone to bed hours ago had I known.